The Seven Deadly Sins

I am convinced that the nuns in my college have officially broken ALL seven of the deadly sins that appear in Faustus. While Faustus had them in his command only for 24 years, these nuns seem to have complete access to them everywhere, all the time. For those of you who are not too familiar with the subject, let me explain. 

The first Deadly Sin is LECHERY or Lust. You need to hang out with H or C to know that I'm right. H not whacks people's asses and pinches them (any part of the body she can reach), but she is a regular dominatrix! Whip, strait jacket, handcuffs including a leather lined one... She'll soon be adding a bed to her collection, wait and watch! At least H is nice... C, on the other hand, not only calls us rascals and manipulative, she also wraps her arm around waists, strokes arms, neck and hair. Believe me, it is VERY creepy, especially since you dont know which part of your body she's going to reach for next. I ALWAYS make it a point to stand with a table between us. Better than these two is Cheche, the nun who sits in the library to check if the pictures on students' ids match their faces. All she does is give people hugs. Lechery is a deadly sin irrespective on whether the targets are men or women. 

Second, we have AVARICE or Greed, and with that comes JEALOUSY. Have you ever heard the nuns talking about other colleges? Someone gave WCC 2 crores or something, which is why they are so well off. And Loyola always has a lot of money. Not like us. We have no money at all! They merely FORGET to mention that the money we got was used in RENTING DUSTBINS when NAACK (is that right?) came to visit. The green dustbins are currently in H's room because she 'does not want them to get dirty' because then, she will have to clean them herself. Dustbins are meant to collect dirt!!! I can go on and on about this, but I shan't. I still haven't graduated. Bottom line  - they want more and more money and are jealous of other catholic institutions in the city. 

How could I have not mentioned GLUTTONY and SLOTH? P is almost never in her office. C walks in late everyday. Usually she's sick. Today, not a single VP went to work. Go looking for them and you'll usually find them in or around the canteen. Not always. I said usually. Nuns also  enjoy good food, ice cream... Speaking of which, bribing H with icecream is not unheard of.

That accounts for five of the seven Deadly Sins. Next on the list is PRIDE. Heard of the line 'Pride goeth before Fall'? Well, that describes us. No, seriously. We DESPERATELY need money. Our play has no sponsors. We need to get money BUT we can't ask around a hundered odd sponsors because cell phones are the spawn of the devil (though the union can approach Airtell - sorry you guys. This is just venting. I have nothing aganst you! Good for you that you're allowed, actually) and Pepsi and Coke are just big NO-NOs. As are most of the companies on our list. "We can't let the name of Stella Maris go down..." Yeah, yeah. It went with AP if you ask me. 

 Finally we have WRATH. Man, you should see them when they think we've done something we've not. All very quick to jump to conclusions. Of course, we need to keep OUR tempers when they're being perfectly unreasonable! The unfairness of it all! 

I think they are all puritanical... Preach something and practice something COMPLETELY different. Hypocrites, thats what they are. A nun in my room was copying in the finals for heavens sake! No one caught her. Thats the best part.